Feelings Inside Of Me

Broken Hearted Girl...
In the sofa i am sitting, staring into my computer screen.
I disappear in thoughts and i dont know what to feel.
I am loved, but do I love back?
Yes.
No.
Maybe?

Its hard for me to focus, hard for me to find any type of joy with this day.
I wish i could have a one on one with the ma upstairs.
I want to tell him how I feel.
What i go through.
But he prolly already knows.
The man aint stupid.
The man is "the man" for a reason.
Take it seriously.

But why am I sad if i am loved?
See, i dont know the answer to that question myself.
At this very moment, i am the most narrow person in the whole world.
Do i deserve to be happy?
Love = Happy.
Or?
What is the formula that i need to use in my life?

Plenty of questions, but the answers are few.
Dont know what or how to think anymore.
I think i can lose myself in my own thoughts sometime.
Is that normal?
Anywho....
I am not 1 with myself.
That can be a good answer to why i am sad aka mad.

What do you think?